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Do you ever feel at a loss of what to talk about?

Ted and Terry were sitting at home one evening just staring ahead. The wife told her husband, “I will call Joan to see what they were doing this evening.” Terry talked with Joan to learn that the couple was sipping tea and talking. She hung up the phone and asked Ted, “Why don’t we ever sip tea and talk?” So Ted said, “Go make some tea.” Terry served them tea and they continued staring straight ahead. Ted said, “Call them back and ask them what they are talking about.”

Do you ever feel at a loss of what to talk about?

One of the couples in our (Jim and Ruth Sharon) upcoming book Secrets of a Soulful Marriage


wrote about one key to their love relationship. Learn from Kronda and Jamie’s devotion to keeping the lines of communication open.

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Jamie and Kronda

Our Secret Is to Never Stop Talking: Kronda and Jamie

We knew from the beginning that we wanted our relationship to extend beyond the fanciful dreams of youth. We had both been in long-term relationships before. Two weeks after we began dating, Jamie jokingly asked Kronda to marry her. Ironically, we had our wedding ceremony exactly five years after Jamie’s playful proposal. We were young when we met and young when we married. Through those years we struggled to overcome conventional roles—sharing responsibilities, sharing blame for arguments. Our largest argument centered around who did what—whether housework and homework equated to eight or more hours in the office. Who should do the dishes was our main point of contention.

Three years into our relationship, we found ourselves unable to resolve our increased bickering without external influence. Neither of us sought direct counsel but at a seminar we were attending someone happened to mention a book that explained differences in partners love styles or preferences (Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman).

After reading Chapman’s book, we became more accepting of each other’s personalities and interests. Also, we started setting goals together and talking about things like budgets and plans. Kronda brought work complaints home less frequently. We realized that we needed to be our best selves at home then work and school would take care of themselves. We still struggle, as all human beings do. But we never stop talking.


Are you willing to keep talking, even when the subject is challenging and the emotions are flaring? If you feel yourself being upset and unable to have a useful conversation, take a break. Plan a time to come back to the topic with the intention of being a soulful couple, as you share your own feelings and needs.

What works for you? Leave comments here or at

Check out Soulful Couples at Energy for Life  Coaching and Events tabs.

Be well.

Ruth and Jim Sharon

Coaches for Soulful Couples and Singles Seeking Soulful Connection


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Jim and Ruth Sharon

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